Expert Opinion

What are some ways to boost my child’s self-confidence?

16 Apr
It probably won’t come as a surprise that the sense of security your child develops simply through their relationship with you is actually the foundation of their self-confidence. When you spend quality time together, and you are present during play and activities, your attention and engagement send a powerful message to your little one that they are valued and loved.

 

However, one of the most effective ways to boost your child’s confidence is through play. Play allows children to explore their abilities, take risks in a safe environment, and solve problems creatively. When they succeed, they feel a sense of accomplishment which is developmentally expected for toddlers and preschoolers. Even when things don’t go as planned, they learn resilience and that it’s okay to make mistakes.

To build your child’s confidence, focus on praising your child’s effort rather than the outcome. Instead of saying, “You’re so smart,” try, “I’m proud of how hard you worked on that puzzle.” This encourages a growth mindset, helping them understand the value of effort and perseverance.

 

Confidence and independence kind of go hand-in-hand, so encourage independence by giving your child small, achievable tasks. When children complete tasks on their own, like dressing themselves or helping set the table, it boosts their self-esteem. It’s important to set tasks that are just right for their developmental level—challenging enough to be interesting but not so hard that they become frustrated.

 

Lastly, a little positive self-talk goes a LONG way! Children learn by observing how we speak to ourselves. If you come across a problem that needs solving and say to yourself, “I can figure this out if I keep trying,” your child will likely adopt a similar approach.

 

By creating a supportive environment where your child feels loved, valued, and encouraged to try new things, you’re laying the groundwork for strong self-confidence.

About the author

Amanda Abel is a paediatric psychologist, mum, and founder of Northern Centre for Child Development (NCCD) and Hawthorn Centre for Child Development (HCCD) – multidisciplinary paediatric practices in Melbourne. Working directly and indirectly with hundreds of clients each year, Amanda’s mission is for every child to achieve their best outcomes by equipping families and educators with the tools they need to help kids thrive.
Amanda draws on her own experiences of being a parent along with her extensive training and well-honed skill set to get families thriving. Having worked with families for almost two decades, as a psychologist for the past 11 years in a variety of settings, and a valued board member of the Autism Behavioural Intervention Association, Amanda loves building the confidence of the adults in the lives of children so that they can connect meaningfully, help them reach their full potential, and live a life that reflects their values.
Often appearing on Channel 7 and 9 News and regularly featuring in print media, Amanda is on a mission to make the world better for kids through her clinical work, consulting to some of the biggest global toy manufacturers and educating the digital media industry about making the internet safer for kids.
Photo by Tatiana Syrikova